Escape from the memory hole

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We danced into the early morning hours.  Stardust sprinkling down atop our heads.  We floated beyond all of this.  With the power of your pen, I once again returned to my box.  As I reached for you, I could only feel the contours of my own face.  It was all a reflection back on me now.  I could touch nothing, only the mirror that I could not escape from.  We reached for each other but there was always something between us.  I was drowning in here, swimming through the lies that enable this existence to continue.  As I would enter the light, that not long ago was so far away, more lies would come raining down.  I close my eyes.  It seemed it was most of the time better not to see at all.  In a shutter from the bottom of my spine, I experienced your birth. I didn’t know it at the time.  I’m pretty sure of it now.  What I remember and what I’ve forgotten, all…reflections in a mirror here.  The ripples, pulsing through my skin.  I see you, but my heart can’t cry out now.  I accept my entrapment here.  My words fade. My sentences grow shorter.  Something is rewriting the dictionary.  Destroying the words.  Too many thoughts.  Too many options.  Why are you taking away my words?  I open my eyes and only see the picture of what I think is myself.  I can’t escape the image.  I feel her hand dip down into my brain.  Thoughts change, but the words remain the same.  Behind every corner I am encountered with myself.  The lies I am continuing to swim in, only surround me.  They’ve lost the power of expression.  This does not stop me from being saturated with a false idea of everything.  I close my eyes.  She touches me but I push her away.  Centuries of thought, without the ability to experience ideas separate from what we think we are.  Down here I’m starting to believe I got it all figured out, no matter how many words you take away from me.  As the pages of history continue to be written.  I leap to each new idea.  Traveling through the pond of confusion.  Each one falling into the water as I lift my foot.  As I just be, I touch the way of the universe.  Understanding which seemed so impossible before.  I let it flow through me.  I no longer reach for them.  I no longer have the ability to judge.  I no longer feel trapped.  I have what I have always had, myself.  The lies never stop, piling up to the stars, comfort gained for some.  Not here, where they never really disappear.  In them is all that I ever was.  The hand of history ruled by those who conquer.  Their life, a scattering of forgotten shards from the miscalculations of their unprocessed, inexpressible thoughts.  The thoughts that only take, covering their sight, their skin, all that they are, all they choose to know.  I am fully aware, when I am ready, I will escape from this prison.  It’s something you are not too sure of now are you?  Which is why you work so hard at keeping us trapped.  Drowning in your neurosis.  But we have learned to swim and as more and more w…. are being taken from me, . have found the po… to overcome the lies that have become fact . have found the po… to see what . am As . climb this suffocating mountain of lies to the very top . see all there is . need to see, the entire universe, spread out before me, there are no boundaries here, there is no .

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